I found heart break & pain on the net

My life had become boring, I lacked love and felt alone, even though I am married. I have no idea what happened to the woman I once loved with all my heart. She has become angry & cynical. We stopped talking to each other and began to talk to at each other. Not knowing what to do, I knew divorce is out of the question, for many reasons. Lost and in pain, I posted an ad on a cheating site. In hind site a big mistake, but who could have guessed, I was weak & lost, no excuse but I would eventually pay dearly.

It all started on one November day, I got an answer to my ad from a 30 year old woman, I am almost twice her age. I advised her I wasn’t interested in a younger woman but she was relentless. She wanted to meet me and asked if I could help her out to to the tune of $500.00 to pay her rent, I laughed and told her she had the wrong guy, she insisted upon seeing me anyway.

On a cold Sunday night, late,  she walked into my place our eyes met, I was taken right away. I don’t know why or what ran through my heart & soul but it was powerful and crippling. I was suspect that this woman & her husband were teaming up to take advantage of unsuspecting older guys & was on my guard. We sat and talked, and as I looked at her face, I knew she was much older then she was saying, but her eyes  were captivating & I was taken down by my heart, all my defenses were broken down for the 1st time in my life…….

The card was a set created in my studio, I used a dark blue background. I cut the start out in the back groung put roscolux behing the background & lit it. The house is a prop I purchased to with a light in it. I used 3 spot lights tof light it. When shooting film I would do it in several exposures, but with digital you are limited so I had to balance the lighting. (See Below)

I hope you enjoy the card. I will be posting my New Years card & how it was done in the next few days

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My Boyhood dream

My childhood dream was to live my life in the wilderness, with my family and loved ones. I dreamt of a life of solitude and peace, surrounded by nature in my log cabin. Reflecting upon my life today I know that life would have never been possible for me, yet it is still my fantasy. With life becoming so complex, so complicated, I awaken this dream capturing it in my Christmas card through this photograph. I created this once fantasy that exists in my mind and my heart; the frozen river, the mountains to one side, the forest to the other the Christmas blessing from the sky. Bringing this dream to life, through my lens, and lights allows me to live out my dream in my world of creativity.

We need to slow down, take a moment and let go, remember and reflect upon our lives and what is important to us. Yes this is a fantasy, but without fantasy we have nothing. I hope you enjoy the photograph I created.

Now for the dry stuff; this year is the 1^st year I created my Christmas card digitally, I photographed it on December19, 2011. There are no longer any labs in Westchester that develop film, this is why I used digital. I captured this image on my Canon EOS D50, at 15 Megapixels. The ISO is 200, the shutter speed is 5 seconds and the F stop was F22. I used three Mole Richardson Spot Lights. The props; the trees & log cabin were purchased at Westchester Trains & Hobbies, in the White Plains Mall in White Plains. The log cabin was actually a Doctor’s office, I retouched the signs out.

Bob Buchanan

Yes I do Christmas not the HOLIDAYS, Christmas.

Many of the authors that spoke were extremely boring, one guy droned on forever it seemed, I was about the 10th speaker & the audience was bored. I went up to the podium and opened with; In my former life I was a cop. I have been shot at stabbed at & wrestled knives away from people attempting suicide. But, none of that prepared me to do this book (all true). It broke them up & woke them up. I informed the audience I am self-taught & when I decided to shoot nudes I picked up Penthouse & Playboy and not for the photos or the “articles”, no I looked at how the photos were lite, composed & the settings . I had them back and at that point I began to talk about the purpose of the book, which is to celebrate women for who they are; not what they are. I spoke about how we created the perfect body in the movies, ads & print media. I told the story on what inspired the book. It was an interview in 1991 about the movie pretty woman. They used a leg double for Julia Roberts in the bathtub nude scene. This pissed me off, I mean really Julia Roberts legs weren’t good enough? This is when I started to work on this book. I did expand on these thoughts a bit and sat down, I spoke approx. 5 minutes, I kept it fresh with a lot of energy.

When I sat down a woman we were sitting with, who I knew is a literary agent with agencies in both Boston & NYC. a very pleasant classy woman. we enjoyed her company we spoke about movies & books. I told her about the novels I wrote & have started, as part of the conversation because she told me that is what she represents. It was just conversation I wasn’t pitching her because I have them on the back burner. I am working on producing a movie now. I do have one, my romance novel, The Lunch, finished. I had not tried to sell myself to her.

After my presentation, she told my wife & my friend Carol that she was going to email me she wanted to see my work. I was like wow, a gift beyond my wildest dreams. That doesn’t mean anything will happen. & what I have gained from it is really exciting. I will see, but it seems my life is on a new path, I plan on taking this journey down that path and enjoying every minute no matter where it takes me. anyone want to come? Only requirement .. you have to be a positive person.

My 1st award for my books. It really feels great to get acknowledgment, on this side of my business.

We simply have forgotten how to play. You need to take time out of our day put down the computers, blackberry’s & whatever else you’re using. Grab a yo yo, a slinky take five minutes out of this crazy life we have developed as a society, just forget about this carzy out of control life for five minutes that’s all.

This is what my book is about.